yours for the apocalypse

The war has started. On the way to the supermarket, a firing-squad worth of shots ringing through the air, then, laughter. New Year’s Eve on our doorstep, and not a teenager without a handful of explosives. Last year, I spent New Year’s Eve right in the heart of the battle. A night of poker and […]

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’twas the night before christmas

And all through the house, people were cooking kn√∂del and seitan and vegan cookies and decorating the tree with emtpy beer cans and I’d be willing to bet that there is at least one mouse stirring, somewhere in the joker’s head statue above the entrance where they’ve made their scratchy, squeaky nest, and dreaming of […]

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doctor sweet and mr. appletree

There was only one Saturday English class I ever taught where my student was more hungover than I was. Meet Mr. Appletree. Mr. Appletree loves accounting, his Cambodian mail-order bride, and their son, and he’s writing a science fiction novel about dragons. He has pale, pinkish skin, and I can always hear him coming a […]

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may you and your children be mauled to death by rabid wolves

Ninety-three pages. The baby I spent hours preening over, cooing over, editing and rewriting and rearranging until I got it just right. Retyping it from a print out after the first Seagate hard drive in my Apple laptop crashed. Fussing over ever word, like a parent over an infant, every sentence a finger nail, a […]

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there was an old woman who lived in a shoe

I don’t know how to start the story because I’m not sure where it starts or where it ends. In media res: Me, right now, sitting in the vegan kitchen, next to the crackling wood stove. Two days ago Workshop fired up the circle saw, and we sliced up all the junk wood we found […]

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fuck off azi punks

Tuesday Scissors and I biked into the city. Tuesdays mean farmers’ markets, and farmers’ markets mean free food: fruit and vegetables too ugly too sell, leftovers we’d usually need to climb and dig to get to. Backpacks full of apples, cauliflower, fennel, and salad, we locked up our bikes and took a walk through the […]

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