planet germany

“Turkey is nice. It’s just like chicken, only drier and with less flavor.” So quips the sardonic Birgit of Cathy Dobson’s new book, Planet Germany. When Cathy contacted me to request I review her book on clickclackgorilla, I almost peed myself. I mean, I would consider selling my soul in order to get free books […]

Read More

travel advisory warning

Dimensional portals that have not been brought up to code are reported to have started opening and closing unexpectedly in Dresden, Germany. Several late-night train lines are connecting to stops listed only on maps in The History of Tlön and, if not regarded with extreme caution, may leave passengers hanging from the spire of the […]

Read More

glozzn off! orbeiden!

For those of you who speak German, but who have never been over to the wild east, feast your ears. This is a parody ad about a mechanic from the west who gets a job in the east and can’t understand fuck all. Maybe this is what that taxi driver said to me.

Read More

cow fin

The first time I showed up in Dresden, I packed light. I hadn’t even bothered looking at a map. I figured there would be city maps at the S-Bahn stations, like in Frankfurt, and anyway there would certainly be a newsstand at the train station selling them. My train pulled into Neustadt just past eleven […]

Read More

hellau!

“What are those kids doing?” I ask. It’s raining and two girls are standing in the middle of the street below the apartment, wearing aprons and carrying rolling pins. Every time a car comes along, they stretch a colorful rope across the street in an attempt to stop them. Most of the cars avoid the […]

Read More

immigrant punk

(from the Gogol Bordello show, December 19, 2005, Bucovina Club, Frankfurt am Main) They showed up in town with no warning. Even the woman at the ticket counter wasn’t sure who was playing. Inside, they stirred the crowd into a frenzy with the bow of a fiddle, and then they were gone, the ashes of […]

Read More